These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
