someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I need to calm my uterus...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
