I will die if light touches me.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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