Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
