Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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