i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Come on in and take your pants off
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