Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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