we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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