i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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