I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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