I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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