its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
