David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
