just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize