some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
We named our party play list daddy issues
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
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