Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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