this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
