I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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