If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
