at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
