i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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