That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
