Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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