I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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