I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
