i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize