I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize