whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
