help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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