Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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