I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
