Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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