We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
