just survived the first fart of the relationship.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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