I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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