The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
