he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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