Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Let's paint friendship bongs
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
