very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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