Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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