What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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