She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
