just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
