ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
