Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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