I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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