The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
In America we eat man semen.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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