i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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