Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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