so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
don't judge my taste in strippers
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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